hm…
it has been a while huh?
not sure that i can come here today and say anything of worth
my thoughts seem to jump
there is so much to think over
so much to do

there are so many changes coming
the baby soon
(everyday i want him to come…everyone says that this is normal at this stage)
a move to a new city
it is still TX but its new and different and really a good step for us (we think)
but change is always hard

i will need to work right away
i look forward to doing something more
it looks now as though the pain is from the blood clot
this is a relief to me
there is hope that after the baby comes we can take some strong drug and knock the thing out
an end in sight? we do hope

there a couple of churches that we are excited to check out
and a couple of long lost friends in the area
its not too far from DFW
so weekend visits to friends and family here can be a treat
and the drive to see Luke’s family or mine is not unthinkable
a bit longer but not terribly so

i feel like i have something to say
but words that we use everyday stand in the way of the emotions and the realisations that move me through each day
there has been so much learned
but i cannot yet find a way to share it
strange

maybe i can figure it out and return later to express…
it is quite random but i feel the need to say that

i miss Anna and Angeline and So Young
i miss brunch and long talks with Julie and Faby
i miss train rides to cold places and long walks with hot coffee
i miss having to be awake and showered and dresses and at a place to do a thing that i am personally responsible for

i miss chopping onions and chatting with Craig or Jono or Godwin
i miss writing long letters to Luke and talking on the phone with him for hours
i miss reading three books at the same time all day long on the tops of buildings with tin roofs that keep the rain from soaking me
i miss the life i knew then
but make no mistake i love the life i have now even with the damn sickness and the heavy baby body
i can hardly wait to meet the little fellow and share the new things with him and Luke and making the memories that one day i will be silly enough to record here how much i miss them

all is well here
even in the middle of a lot of rubbish
all is well